Endometriosis Awareness Month

I haven't written on this blog in over a year but today I felt I needed to. Seeing as March is Endometriosis Awareness Month, I thought it would be a good time to make some noise and get some things off my chest about this crippling disease.

What is Endometriosis? 

Endometriosis is a chronic condition where tissue, similar to the lining of the uterus grows outside the uterus, onto places like the ovaries, fallopian tubes, bladder and bowel. In some cases, it can reach other vital organs too, such as the kidneys and lungs. In severe cases, organs become so hugely affected that they need to be removed. 

The condition can cause immense pain for those who have it. Think of the worst period pains you've ever had, then times that by ten. That is how I feel 80% of the time. Its debilitating. 

There is no cure for this disease, nor is there any known cause. Those of us with the condition live off heavy painkillers, use hot water bottles until our stomachs are covered with burns, and may need regular surgeries to remove the endometriosis. Even hysterectomies are not guaranteed to stop it. It also can't be diagnosed without surgery, as it doesn't show up on scans. So getting a diagnoses is hard work.  

Oh, and did you know that Endometriosis also affects the immune system? Yeh...

My Story

I've been having symptoms of Endometriosis for YEARS! After my sister was diagnosed in her teens, I suspected it had it too as I had the exact same symptoms. It took one botched laparoscopy and a second successful one in 2019 to be diagnosed with severe endometriosis (stage 4). My gynaecologist found endometriosis growing around my left ovary, with the mass attaching itself to my bowel. I also had it on my bladder and pouch of douglas. It explained all of my symptoms, from my terrible period pains to my frequency to use the toilet (TMI, soz…). I was also told that it would affect my fertility and I've been encouraged to have children as soon as I can.

Great. 

Last month I had a check-up, following my surgery in June. I was having recurring symptoms so my gynaecologist gave me an emergency scan. My ovary is stuck again, indicating the endometriosis may have returned. As a result, I am back on Zoladex. This is a horrific treatment for those of us with endo. In simple terms, it puts us through a 'mini-menopause', to stop the growth of any further endometriosis. This should also help with the pain and keep me in check until my next surgery. I was on it last year before surgery as a precaution. In general, it does help with the pain, but the other side affects are horrific. Hot flushes, mood swings, crying at EVERYTHING... My mental health took a nose dive and I just shut myself away as much as I could. 

 I started the next round of injections today. You would not believe how big the needle is (take a look at the wiki page!) and how much it hurt. Part of why I'm writing this is because I need to focus on something other than the pain and let out my frustration that I have to go through this. But I will do what it takes to reduce the growth of the endo and ultimately reduce the pain I'm in.

This, and self-isolating because of COVID-19 should be fun. 

I can't illiminate the pain completely, but I'm finding new ways to cope every day, both physically and mentally. 

I'm trying to keep a routine as much as possible. I'm working from home, so I am starting and finishing at the same time everyday, ensuring I take my regular medications each day at the same time and taking regular breaks. I try to take a short walk at lunch each day, as exercise is usually too painful, but a little leg stretch and some fresh air does the trick. 

I've got a HUGE to-be-read pile which I am working on. I find reading takes me to a different place and really improves my mental health, so I'll take time each day to read, even just a little bit. (Follow me on Goodreads!)

I've also just started Skyrim (I may have had to get my partner to walk me through the start of it, but I've got the hang of it now!). Gaming helps me escape the real world and pass the time if I'm having a bad day, so I'm excited to sink my teeth into it. 

Obviously, there's the matter of social distancing now, which I am going to find really hard. I'm a house-cat, but the times I do leave the house really do help, even if it is just going to work. I'm going to try to see my family when I can, but keeping socialising to a minimum. My workaround is playing Dungeons and Dragons over Skype and actually making PHONE CALLS to people!!! Anyone who knows me knows I HATE talking on the phone, so this is going to be my biggest challenge! 

I just hope that with my new treatment I am able to manage my symptoms relatively well, as the chances of me having another surgery this year is now very unlikely. There are some really great communities on Facebook and Instagram where I can keep in touch with my fellow endo-sisters, so I know I'm not alone. 

If anyone is struggling with endometriosis, or think you my have it, I am more than happy to chat with you. I am in no way an expert, but after almost ten years fighting the sysytem to get diagnosed and proper treatment, I might be able to offer you some advice and reassurance. 

Just know you're not alone.

Love, Jade x

Everything hurts. Period.

Artwork by Emma Plunkett

 A TMI rant about my battle with my uterus

It’s 2015. I’m 21. I’m living my best life. I’m at a gig once a week, in London for one reason or another, at the gym 5 times a week. I launched a blog and doing really well in my day job. I feel the most confident I’ve ever been. I’m happy and healthy. 

And then I wasn’t. 

I’ve suffered from bad period pains ever since aunt flo first visited.  I remember being sent home from school a lot because the pain was crippling, but my doctors dismissed it as normal. 

“Most women get cramps, you just gotta get on with it.”

"It's probably not as bad as you think it is. Don't think about it"

I was 11 years old when a doctor told me that having a baby will probably "cure my cramps". I've been told the same thing at subsequent appointments up until now. I mean, I definitely want kids, but for the right reasons and at the right time for me. 

"Hey kids, did you know you exist solely because your mum wanted to conduct an experiment on herself?"

Anyone with a uterus has probably had some form of period pain in their life. Even if you've had very mild pains, I'm sure you can agree they aren't exactly pleasant.

Don't get me wrong, being a woman is amazing. I mean, we can grow people inside of us! We can feed babies with our boobies! (yes i said boobies) 

But my god, my uterus is a bitch.

The level of pain I've experienced has peaked and troughed through the years. I remember times when I couldn't stand because the pain was so bad. I remember times where I had no pain at all. I remember in 2015, when I was having the time of my life, I wasn't experiencing anything near to what I am now. 

What the hell happened, uterus!? We were just becoming friends!? *insert I can't believe you've done this vine here*

Today I'm living in constant pain. The cramps are daily. Excessive movement feels like I've ripped one of my ovaries off. Even sneezing can cause pain. It's ruining my relationships, my mental well being, my job...

It's exhausting. 

About two years ago I was sent to a gynaecologist who was convinced I had endometriosis. My sister has it, and my symptoms are almost identical, so that's what they went with. A laparoscopy was planned and treatment in the meantime arranged. I'd try every contraception until I found one that "worked". 

None of them "worked" and I'm convinced some of them made things worse... but I'm not the doctor. What would I know about my own body!?

I also tried other remedies suggested by different doctors; CBD oil, yoga, light exercise, rest, hot water bottles (my best friends), hot baths... I even tried therapy, which helped me manage the negative effects the pain had on my mental health. Sort of. 

Fast forward a year, my pain was unbearable, I still hadn't had the op, and I was going mad from being in constant pain. I was scared I'd lose my job (despite constant reassurance from managers it was fine), I spiralled into a pit of depression and my anxiety skyrocketed. I used to get anxious going to events but now it was because I had to cancel plans. All. The. Damn. Time. I think a lot of my family and friends got a bit fed up with me, but I was exhausted. I could just about manage a full day at work. 

The strain that this pain has on me physically and mentally is too much, so I usually get home and just sleep. Goodbye social life. 25 going on 75 amirite?! 

I went to hospital a few times from excessive bleeding and terrible cramps. I was having symptoms of a miscarriage at one point, despite not being pregnant. I went to the hospital just in case to be told it was only my period. Again, the gynaecologist was certain it must be endometriosis, and again I was told that pregnancy might stop it. 

At this point I even considered it.

After getting nowhere with my laparoscopy, doc sent me private where I finally had the op. I was told there was no endometriosis, but I did have a twisted ovary so he fixed it. I was relieved because it must have been that, right?!

Well, a few things came to light about my surgery and the gynaecologist I saw, which I won't detail (I'd be here all day), but it has meant I'm now getting a second opinion from another private gynaecologist.

Back to square one yay!

This new gynaecologist is, again, convinced it's endometriosis, but because I've already tried almost everything, he's pulled out the big guns. Zoladex. I'm injected with oestrogen every three months and will probably be getting menopausal symptoms, but in return, I'm supposed to be pain free. Sounds fun right? If things don't get better, I get to have another op. Lucky me!

So far, I've not noticed a change. But it's early days. 

I'm currently typing this, at 3am on a Friday morning after two days off work from severe pain that even tramadol won't mask. (By the way, tramadol is a horrible pain killer and messes with your sleep pattern... 10/10 don't recommend unless you really have to take it.)  

All I really want is answers. Obviously, I don't want anything wrong with me, but being told nothing is wrong is driving me insane. I know my body and I know something is not right. This isn't normal (despite what several male doctors have told me) and I'd like an explanation.

Even if it is "you're completely insane and your brain in making this all up". 

Hopefully there is a light at the end of this tunnel, but for now I plan to refill my hot water bottle, get into Bālāsana, and cry myself asleep. Lol. 

Jade x

New Additions to my Makeup Collection

This week I decided to up my makeup game. Looking in my *tiny* makeup drawer made me angry and even more so when I realised my light coverage BB creams and powder just won't cut it this time of year. Stupid blemishes! 

My birthday was Tuesday and my lovely boyfriend bought me the Urban Decay Naked Smoky palette. I'm completely in love with it! It has a mixture of shimmery and matte high pigmented nudes, blues, greens and browns to create the perfect smoky eye. It also comes with a double ended brush which is perfect for blending. It's definitely beat Naked 3 for sure! 

I have been desperate to try something from Kiko Cosmetics since they opened a store in Bluewater, so I picked up the Kiko Unlimited Liquid Foundation in shade Warm Rose 30. It suits my skin tone perfectly and is incredibly soft and lightweight. It's only £14.90 for a full sized bottle and you only need a small amount for each application. This is by far the best liquid foundation I've tried! 

I also splurged on Cult Beauty and bought the Anastatia Beverly Hills Cream Contour Palette and Brow Wiz, which came in the post today! I haven't used either yet but tomorrow I'm going to give them a go and possibly do a review. I'm hoping they both live up to the hype! 

I then suddenly realised I have a contour kit but no contour brushes. Luckily my local Asda sell Real Techniques so I picked up the four brush set. I've heard these brushes are brilliant, but I'll let you know how I get on! 

My make up drawer is looking a little healthier now. I can't say the same for my bank account though... 

Have you tried any of these products? Let me know your thoughts. 

bareMinerals Prime Time Original Foundation Primer

I use the bareMinerals Loose Powder, but it wouldn't have the same effect on me if I didn't use a decent primer. When I visited the bareMinerals counter, they let me try their Prime Time Original Founation Primer, then they applied the powder. I bought it immediately after I saw myself in the mirror. And later that night, my makeup didn't look any different. Success! 

I've tried lots of primers in the past, including those high end primers every blogger has tried, but none compare to this. This primer comes in a pump bottle so that only a small amount is dispensed. This saves you accidentally squeezing out too much and you only need a very small amount to cover your entire face. 

It has a very soft, smooth finish which helps to even skin tone, reduce pores and create a blank canvass to flawlessly apply makeup. It is not drying or oily like some other primers I've tried. 

I usually leave it a few minutes after application to apply my foundation so that it can set properly. I think this benefits me more than applying foundation immediately after; I find my makeup lasts longer by doing this. 

With this primer, I only need to reapply makeup if i have been wearing it for longer than normal. I can go 10-12 hours with my makeup on without it sliding off and needing to be reapplied. 

Prime Time is only £22 and is available from your local bareMinerals counter. I can't recommend it enough! 

Are you a fan of bareMinerals?

Birchbox at Selfridges

Birchbox set up shop in Selfridges, Oxford Street this month giving customers to opportunity to create their own beauty box from a range of products from a huge range of brands for just £15. You heard me. I'm talking Benefit, Clarins, Stila, Eyeko...  *heart eyes*

I popped into Selfridges this week to create my own; I felt like I kid in a sweet shop. There was SO much choice! The ladies from Birchbox gave me a list of what was on offer, alongside a specially designed box and one of their famous drawstring bag. I was allowed to pick six products out of the entire range; two makeup items, one body, one hair, one skincare and one little treat! I must have circulated the counter about 20 times before deciding on these beauties...

Eyeko Fat Eye Stick in Gilt

I love love love Eyeko! I adore their eyeliners so this was a must have! The fat eye stick is an ultra-pigmented jumbo crayon to help create the perfect smokey eye. The shade is called Gilt which is a metallic gold/grey colour. You can use this as you would a normal liner or smudge it to create an eyeshadow. This is the full sized product, which I can't find on the Eyeko website. Perhaps it's an exclusive to Birchbox, as you can buy a set of three for £16 on the Birchbox website. 

Lord & Berry Shiny Crayon Lipstick in Fire

I have a few Lord & Berry products already that I absolutely love! The pigmentation of their products, be it liner or lipstick, is astounding and is long lasting! I'm a sucker for a red lip so picking this was a no brainer. This soft lip pencil comes in the colour Fire and it's absolutely beautiful! The photo doesn't do it justice. This again is the full sized product which you can buy for £10 on the Lord & Berry website. That's just £5 off the cost of the entire box. Wowzers! 

Clarins HydraQuench Cream Mask

I'm going to admit it, I've never tried anything from Clarins. I hear that their products are amazing but they are a little too expensive for me! This is a 30Ml bottle of their cream mask which promises to "deliver intense hydration and boost the thirstiest skin". My skin can get quite dry in the Autumn so I'm sure this will come in handy! You're supposed to leave the mask on for 5-10 minutes for the best results. I can't wait to try it! The  full size75ml bottle is £33 on the Clarins Website, so I think this is quite a good sample size to have received. 

Rituals Honey Touch Body Cream

Rituals is one of my favourite brands for shower gel and body wash. I chose to try their Honey Touch Body Cream which smells absolutely define. I'm saving this for a special occasion because it smells too good to use, and I'm a moisturizer hoarder! This is a 70ml bottle but it usually comes in a 200ml pot at £17, which you can buy from the Rituals website. 

Beauty Protector Protect and Detangle

I've had this before in a Birchbox a while ago and absolutely loved it, but I forgot the name of the brand and gave up searching for it. This is a multi-function hair care product which acts mainly as a leave in conditioner and heat protector. From previous experience it leaves hair soft and conditioned and instantly detangles. It was a life saver on holiday and the scent completely disguised the smell of chlorine from to pool. I'm so glad to have got my hands on it again! Unfortunately it doesn't say how much is in the bottle, but the full sized product is 236ml and is only £14 on the Birchbox website. 

This Works Sleep Plus Pillow Spray

One of my favourite bloggers posted about this a while back and I've been interested in trying it since. I've been struggling with my sleep for a long time and very few methods have helped me. This pillow spray is lavender scented and claims to restore a healthy sleep pattern. I'm going to give it a try tonight! This comes in a 5ml bottle and you can buy two different sizes on the This Works website, the cheapest being £25 for 75ml. If it really does what it says on the tin, I'll definitely invest in the full sized version. 

The popup shop is only in Selfridges until 27th September, so if you're heading down to Oxford Street this weekend be sure to check it out! You also get 50% off your first Birchbox with your purchase. What's not to like? 

Have you created your own Birchbox with Selfridges? What did you choose? 

Garnier Micellar Cleansing Water

A couple of years ago I tried my first sample of a cleansing water. It was a high end brand and was fairly expensive, so I didn't buy the full sized version even though it worked wonders. I stuck with my trusty makeup wipes and Cleanse and Polish by Liz Earle to keep my face fresh. I slowly, finally figured that there's only so much a wet wipe can do, so on a whim I bought the Garnier Micellar Cleansing Water. I hadn't heard of it before but it was on a pink "pedestal" in Boots and I liked the packaging, what can I say! It went straight in my basket....

Trying this for the first time was exciting. I wasn't sure what to expect for £4.99 but I was astonished with the results. Depending on how heavy my makeup is during the day, I only need to use 1-2 cotton pads soaked with Micellar cleanser to clean my face. To remove mascara, I hold the pads on my eyes for a few seconds and swipe off. I'll admit it's a little harder to remove mascara with it, but it's better than the results I get with a makeup wipe by far. 

The feeling after I've removed my makeup with the cleansing water is incredible. My face feels flawless and fresh. I don't feel clean unless I use a face wash but I can use this water alone to remove my makeup and be happy if I don't have my Cleanse and Polish to hand. The product instructions say no rinsing required; considering it's mainly water, that makes sense! My face looks radiant after use, whereas with a makeup wipe my skin can look quite dull and dry. I use this sometimes if I want to have a makeup free day to give myself a bit of a glow.

I don't usually find a product that I love instantly but this is genuinely my new favourite. It's now part of my daily routine and it's going to take a miracle product (at the same price, if not less) to replace it.

You can find the Garnier Micellar Cleansing Water at your local drugstore and online in stores such as FeelUnique.com. It comes in a 400ml bottle or a handy 125ml travel sized bottle. Great for holidays, weekends away or festivals! 

Buh-bye makeup wipes. I have a new love in my life!

Have you tried the Garnier Micellar Cleansing Water? What do you think of it?

bareMinerals Loose Powder

I was recommended bareMinerals by a friend who's skin makes me green with envy (although I know she wouldn't agree!). We often agree that we hate foundation because of the way it feels on our skin, but one day she told me about bareMinerals Loose Powder. Apparently it provided lightweight, long-lasting coverage whilst improving complexion. I had to try it for myself...

I visited a bareMinerals counter in Bluewater one weekend. The staff were happy to match my skin tone with the bareMinerals Original SPF 15 Foundation. Honestly, their customer service is the best! The young lady I spoke with removed the foundation I was wearing and applied a moisturizer and primer before she tested my skin tone so that we could achieve the best results. Once we found the right colour, she gave me a mini makeover so I wouldn't have to walk around with no makeup on. Using the bareMinerals Full Flawless Face brush, she buffed the loose powder onto one side of my face. Then she asked me to do the other side so she could see whether I was applying it right and to give me guidance on how to apply it properly. She then applied a bit of bronzer and showed me the best technique to use (which essentially contours your face in seconds) and added a setting powder. My skin looked fantastic! I took home the power, the brush and the primer.

The shade of powder I have is Fair. Using the Full Flawless Face brush, it's so easy to apply. Just buff on in circular motions. I like to apply a thin, natural looking layer onto my face, but you can build it up as much as you like. It is extremely lightweight and feels much better than many other powders I've used.

As it's a loose powder you only need to tap out a small amount and it will cover your whole face. As I said, use more if you want a more built up finish. I do this if I'm going out for the night and need that little bit of extra coverage!

The thing I love most about this foundation is that it is completely natural looking. It doesn't go cakey like some foundations and although it evens my skin tone, I can still see some of my "imperfections", such as freckles, underneath. Plus, the SPF protects my skin from those harmful UV rays, which helps my skin stay in good condition.

Applied over my bareMinerals Primer, my makeup will stay put throughout the majority of the day without sliding off. So no need for re-application. Result!

Convinced? Head over to your local bareMinerals counter and get colour matched. You won't be disappointed!

Birthday Wishlist

1. New Look Bag - £24.99

2. Urban Decay Smoky Palette - £38

3. Pandora September Birthstone Ring - £40

4. Go Set a Wachaman by Harper Lee - £9

5. L'occitaine Immortelle Precious Cream - £46 

6. Public Desire Jayda Lace Up Heels - £29.99

My birthday is coming up so obviously I've been busy thinking about what I'd like to ask for. I got a bit stuck to be honest. I usually treat myself and buy myself what I want throughout the year so there's not much I want/need.

I love this cute little bag from New Look. Most of my bags are New Look and are such great quality. I love these colours too!

Obviously the new Urban Decay Smoky Palette is on my list. Everyone I follow on Instagram seems to have it and I want it too! I only own Naked 3 which is a beautiful palette, but I do love a smokey eye.

This Pandora ring is beautiful right? My sister has two of these rings and I absolutely adore them, so she's actually bought me one of my own! I only know because I had to get it sized when she bought it, whoops! But I can't have it until my birthday *big sigh*. I can't wait to wear it every day!

I'm currently reading To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee which is a classic. I wasn't fortunate enough to read it in school (we read Of Mice and Men instead, great book!). I really like the sound of Go Set A Watchman. I think it's cool that it's being released as a sequel so long after To Kill a Mockingbird was released. I'm hoping that I enjoy both books. Considering how well both books have done on the market, I'm sure I won't be disappointed.

I'm not going to ask for this one, it's way too expensive! But maybe if I get any birthday money I'll buy it myself! I tried this face cream around 6 months ago and have been dreaming about it ever since. It smells amazing and made my skin so clear. Every time I walk past L'occitaine in Bluewater it takes every bit of strength to not buy this! It is such a dream product! Birthday present to myself, perhaps?

PublicDesire followed me on Instagram so I checked out their website. I fell in love with these Jayda Lace Up Heels (not just because of the name!). Although I'm lusting over them, I'd have nowhere to wear them to, or wear them with. But they are just gorgeous though aren't they?!

My birthday's on the 29th and I'm going to be 22 which isn't a huge milestone. I have nothing special planned other than a day in my pyjamas drinking wine like the grown up I am.

Boy. I'm getting old.

What I read in August

I've been trying to read as much as possible recently and my aim is to get through at least three books a month. Today I thought I'd share with you what I read in August and what my thoughts were...

The Year I Met You by Cecelia Ahern (7/10)

Ireland's Cecelia Ahern has written another fantastic novel, but don't be fooled by the title, this isn't much of a love story! Jasmine, a business woman and workaholic, has lost her job and has to take a years gardening leave. The story follows Jasmine on her journey to find herself whilst building up an unlikely friendship with her rowdy neighbour, Matt, from across the road. Matt is a controversial radio DJ, who unknowingly offended Jasmine years back during a discussion on air about Downs Syndrome. Jasmines sister, Heather, has Downs Syndrome and naturally Jasmine is very protective of her. Matt gets fired from his job and his marriage crumbles as a result, leaving him in a similar situation as Jasmine. Can they learn to overcome their differences?

This is a beautifully written novel about creating and maintaining friendships and the power of forgiveness. The Year I Met you is an unconventional, humorous, feel-good novel.

Paper Towns by John Green (8/10)

If you've seen the Paper Towns movie this year, forget what you saw. The movie doesn't even compare to the book by a long shot. Quentin "Q" is in love with his mysterious neighbour, Margo. As kids the two were friends, until one day they stumble across a dead body (don't worry, that's not a spoiler!) and they drift apart. One night, towards the end of high school, Margo unexpectedly climbs into Q's window and the two embark on a late night journey around Orlando. Q, reluctant at first, has the time of his life and can't wait to see Margo the next day. But Margo doesn't turn up for school. She's not at home. No one knows where she is and no one seems to care. Q, convinced that their night together meant something more, discovers "clues"  left by Margo. He needs to find her. He needs to tell her how he feels.

I adored this book and will probably read it again this year. The mystery of Margo is intriguing and all I wanted to do was find out where she was, which meant I read the book in less than 24 hours. I fell in love with the characters, especially Q's friends who added a lot of humor to what is quite a deep story. I'd recommend this to anyone who's looking for a good read.

The Book Theif by Markus Zusak (9/10)

The Book Thief is by far my favourite book of the three. A word of warning though; it's a really long book and you will definitely shed a tear! The story follows Leisel who has been sent to live in Germany with the Hubermanns during World War 2. Leisel can't read but after stealing her first book at her brother's funeral, Hans Hubermann helps her learn. Leisel's best friend, Rudy, helps her steal books to read and they develop a love/hate relationship for each other.  What I loved most about this book is that Death narrates the story. Death has a very morbid sense of humor and will often wander away from the story s/he is telling to tell you about how a random character dies in the future. From the offset, you know that there's not going to be a happy ending. This is a gripping and agonizing tale of two Germans taking in a young girl, bringing her up in Nazi Germany whilst harboring a Jew in their basement. The ending is heartbreaking yet joyous, so make sure you have your tissues ready!

As I said, this book is incredibly long. I couldn't even touch upon everything that happens (not that I'd want to spoil anything for you anyway!) in such a small summary. This is, so far, my favourite book of all time.

Have you read any of these books? What where your thoughts?

Goodbye Summer, Hello Autumn

What a summer it's been!  I've finally had a chance to chill out and look back at everything that has happened this season. I may have had the best summer of my life...

I spent two days at Hyde Park's British Summer Time and went to Wireless and V Festival. I saw so many of my favourite artists (my favourites being Taylor Swift, The Who and Stereophonics!) and discovered new ones (Charli XCX is by far my new fave!). I had such a great time regardless of the music and that's all down to the people I shared those moments with. It's also prompted me to purchase a weekend ticket to V Festival next year, whoops! (There's currently a discount on weekend tickets so head over to their website now). I'm hoping to go to Glastonbury and Download as well in 2016! 

I've lost myself in some great books, my favourites being Paper Towns and The Book Thief. If you haven't read either I suggest you do so! I was such a terrible reader before and would read maybe one book a year, if that. One of my friends, who is an aspiring writer, helped me rediscover the joy of reading (by letting me read the first drafts of his new book series. Trust me, it's going to be a hit!). I'm currently on To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee which I need to finish soon so I can read Go Set a Watchman! 

Discovering my own style was another one of my highlights. What's better than feeling pretty and confident? Nothing! My wardrobe is all pastel, pastel, pastel! Please, fashion gurus, don't make me hide away my pastels for AW15! 

What about the amazing weather we've had? Although it's pretty bleak outside today, we've had some beautiful sunny days. I bought my dream car this year (a baby blue convertible Beetle, like the one on 90210!) so I spent a lot of my time cruising around with my friends, top down at sunset, singing our favourite songs. It's the little things like that that mean the most. We might even be lucky enough to get some more sun in the next few weeks! 

I don't know about you though, but I'm definitely ready for over-sized jumpers, hot chocolate, dark evenings and the best holiday of all time, Halloween! I cannot wait for Autumn!

Bootea 14 Day Detox Bundle

 A few months ago I discovered Bootea, a detox tea which claims to help you lose weight in as little as 14 days. Now, I know what you're thinking; how can that be possible? How can that be healthy? Well, I thought I'd give it a go for myself to see what the results would be for me. I chose to order the Bootea 14 Day Detox Bundle to try out all of their products in one hit, with hopes of seeing the best results.

Maybe I should give you a little background info on why I did the detox. I had been slacking at the gym and was beginning to feel as if I wasn't progressing. My eating habits grew worse, my workouts became shorter and my sleeping pattern was appalling. I needed a kick up the arse but needed a head start. That's where Bootea comes in. I needed to learn to cut down my portions and switch my glasses of wine and cups of coffee for something a little healthier.

*Before you read the following, please remember that these are my own personal views and experiences using these products and that I do not promote, nor agree with fad/extreme dieting. I am doing this for my health and wellbeing and do not believe that I can lose a significant amount of weight in a short space of time*

Bootea Daytime Detox

First thing in the morning, as soon as my alarm goes off, I jump out of bed (ok, more like crawl aimlessly whilst silently sobbing...) and rush down to the kitchen to pop the kettle on. Goodbye milky coffee, hello healthy! I look forward to having my morning Bootea brew each day now and I'll continue to drink it for the foreseeable future. The tea helps start your metabolism first thing in the morning, whilst providing your body with a digestive cleanse and suppressing your appetite. I like to reuse teabags where possible so I was delighted to know I could get two strong cups of tea from just one bag. You only get 14 teabags in the pouch so don't waste them! I strongly believe that the daytime detox is responsible for the majority of my success in this experiment! If you aren't keen on green tea, don't worry! This tea has a lovely taste to it, no where near as dull as a cup of green tea!

Bootea Little Oats

 Bootea have created a portion of healthy oats, full of protein and fibre, to kick start your day. It is incredibly easy to make, just add a little hot water and mix! This porridge is extremely creamy, so there is no need to add milk. It tastes delicious, but there is nothing stopping you from adding your own toppings! I covered mine in raspberries and golden syrup on several occasions. I ate the oats first thing in the morning, alongside my cup of Bootea Morning Tea obviously, and I was energised and full until midday! At only 148 calories per pack, this breakfast is bound to help you achieve your fitness goals.

Bootea Shake

This was my absolute favourite part of the bundle! This comes with a handy shaker so that you can have your drink on the go. The shake satisfied my hunger in between lunch and dinner and I made sure I drank it at least half an hour before heading to the gym (unless it was a rest day, then I took it to the movies with me!). I felt I could go 2-3 hours without eating anything as it was incredibly filling! The shake is full of natural ingredients and plenty of vitamins to keep energy levels up and to stop cravings for naughty food! The shake is so nice that the only problem I had with it is that I craved it ALL DAY until I finally allowed myself to have it. Proves how strong my willpower is though, clearly!

Bootea Nightime Cleanse

This part of the detox usually has everyone talking. So to start, yes, it does induce a laxative effect, but how strong the effect is is obviously down to each individual as all of our bodies function differently.  However, I do recommend that the first time you try the nighttime cleanse, ensure it's the night before a day off or something so that you can see how well your body reacts to it. Other than that, there are really no downsides. The tea cleanses your digestive system as you sleep, which left me feeling light and refreshed in the morning.  I noticed that I was less bloated in the mornings too, which was a huge plus for me as I'm so self conscious about my tummy! The tea itself has an acquired taste, but it's not horrendous.

Overall results

After two weeks on the cleanse, along with a healthy diet, plenty of sleep, water and exercise, I can honestly say I think this detox did me a world of good. I don't weigh myself so I can't guarantee I've lost weight, but I feel that my clothes fit a little better now! I think the main benefit for me is how I felt during and after the detox, which was fantastic! I think I'll leave it a short while before I go through this detox again, as it does take a lot of willpower, but it definitely helped me kick start my new healthy lifestyle. Like I've said before, I don't think it's healthy to think that this detox will help you drop a tonne of weight in just two weeks, but it clearly does good for your insides. 

Head over to www.bootea.com to order your own bundle! 

Guess who's back

I've decided to come back to blogging after a long, unexplained hiatus. I needed a break from blogging to focus on the most important things in life, such as my physical and mental health and my relationships with the people around me.

I no longer spend hours in bed, watching Netflix, feeling sorry for myself (although I haven't said goodbye to my Netflix account just yet!). I've joined the gym and spend the majority of my time there. My family have joined too, which means I can spend more time with them whilst we help each other achieve our fitness goals. Working out relieves so much of my stress; I always feel a thousand times better after hitting the gym.

I've also finished a course of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to help me manage my anxiety. The techniques I've learned have vastly improved my life. Therapy helped me gain the courage to stop taking anti-depressants and although it was a difficult time, I feel better for going through with the treatment. I may touch upon this in a future post as I think it's really important to talk about.

Improving my mental health means I've been more interested in going out with friends more. My relationships with friends and family have drastically improved and I spend a lot more time with my loved ones now. I think that's the most important change I have made so far.

I've decided to make some changes to my blog too. I've changed the design (thanks Pipdig!) and I'm going to focus more on things that I enjoy, rather than what's "fashionable" in the blogosphere. I'm excited to start writing about books, movies, music, traveling, etc, as well as sticking to the beauty aspect of my blog. I want my blog to finally represent me as a person instead of me as just another blogger!

I hope I can engage more readers with a wider variety of topics. If there are any topics you'd like to see me write about, feel free to tell me!

Thanks to all who have already welcomed me back! I can't wait to get back into the swing of things.

PS; share your blogs and twitter handles with me below!

GHD V Rose Gold Limited Edition Styler

Ok so today I wanted to share with you one of my favorite Christmas gifts (are we still allowed to talk about Christmas or is it too late?). I was very good last year and was given a limited edition GHD V Styler! I've been refusing to take them out of the box until I had taken photos for this post, so now that I've gotten round to it I can finally make the most of them, but aren't they beautiful!?

I already have a pair of trusty wide-plated GHDs that I got years ago, which is perfect for my thick hair, but not the pesky, stubborn short hair that I'm still trying to grow out. This baby not only works wonders on straightening all of my hair (despite the thin plates, which I thought would never tame my mane), but it can get the little fly-aways or baby-hair that are finally growing out!

I was very ignorant for a long time thinking that my GHDs were just "straighteners". They are called "Stylers" for a reason, Jade! Now I can do pretty much any style of wave or curl with my GHDs (with a little practise of course); I find dead straight hair boring on me anyway! This styler can produce a much tighter curl, something I wasn't really able to do with my wide-plated GHDs. However, these still create the perfect loose wave that I love.

I really just wanted to just show these off because I think they look amazing! I absolutely love the rose gold colour and the pattern engraved on the styler. I'm a sucker for packaging and I absolutely love how these are presented in the matching box! The set includes a heatproof storage bag and mat, which is great for when you're in a rush and have to wait around for your stylers to cool down before you can put them away! The storage bag is big enough to store a comb for styling too. You also receive two GHD hair clips and a protective plate guard.

I am genuinely in love with this styler and couldn't be more grateful to have received them for Christmas. Thanks Dad!

Are you a fan of GHD? What other stylers do you like to use?

Liz Earle Cleanse and Polish Hot Cloth Cleanser

About 6 months ago Birchbox gave their subscribers a sample of cult beauty product Liz Earle's Cleanse and Polish Hot Cloth Cleanser. I immediately ditched my normal cleanser and started using Cleanse and Polish, hoping to find out what the fuss was about.

I've found every time I buy Cleanse and Polish I receive one or two 100% muslin cloths. This is the "hot cloth" that assists in the cleansing and polishing! A 100ml tube will last me around 2 months. One pump releases enough cleanser for your face and neck and each pump is measured evenly so there's no waste. You literally use every last drop in the bottle. 

Application is easy. One pump of the bottle and apply the cleanser to dry skin. I like to massage it in for maximum cleansing to lift as much dirt, grime and make-up from my pores as possible. Then you run your muslin cloth under hand-hot water and rinse. Gently polish the cleanser away, using a clean section of the cloth each time. Once you've done that, splash your face with cold water to close your pores and voilà! Beautifully cleansed and polished skin! 

I much prefer using Cleanse and Polish than any other cleanser. Previous products I've used had a lot of soap in them, which leaves my skin quite dry after cleansing. As Cocoa Butter is a main ingredient, Cleanse and Polish leaves skin hydrated and radiant, It really does de-clog pores, so I've had less break-outs in recent months. It's also perfect for creating a clean canvas for make-up too as it leaves skin incredibly soft and smooth. 

I'm absolutely in love with this product and I couldn't rave about it more! I definitely feel that my skin is much healthier and more radient since I've switched to Cleanse and Polish, and unless there is some super duper miracle product that gets released that promises to eradicate spots before they even happen, then I'm definitely not switching back to anything else. 

No wonder Liz Earle has won hundreds of awards. Cleanse and Polish is absolutely flawless (and now so is my skin...almost)!

Purchase your own bottle here!

NYR Organic Beauty Boost Capsules

I've recently started looking after my body more, be it going to the gym, eating healthier, drinking more green tea and water and using only the best beauty products! I later discovered Neil's Yard Remedies Beauty Boost Supplements, which have helped boost these results! Now I wouldn't normally take something like this just to look good, but here's why I chose to try these...

They are full of healthy, natural ingredients! 

NYR's Beauty Boost supplements contain natural ingredients, including frankincense, vitamin c, MSM, pine bark extract, zinc and other healthy minerals!

They are good for your skin, hair and nails! 

Beauty Boost supplements help to promote collagen formation, the protein that is needed to strengthen your hair, nails and skin. The combination of vitamins and minerals make you feel revitalised and are good for your immune system as well as being good for your skin. Essentially, these tablets help keep your hair, skin and nails healthy and that's exactly what they do!

In my opinion

I've been on these tablets for around 3 weeks now and I can certainly say I've seen a difference. I've found my nails are no longer breaking, thus making them grow rapidly in length. The same goes for my hair, it's much healthier and thicker, with less damaged ends than I had before. Again, this has helped my hair grow really quickly and it makes me feel much more confident with myself. My skin is clearing up, slowly but surely, with a few outbreaks but for me that's common! I've started gaining more energy and motivation to do things, like going to the gym, which in turn is helping my lose weight and tone up! These tablets have given me the boost of confidence I've needed for a long time, and I feel 100 times better since taking these.

These tablets are only £17.50 for 60 capsules, which last 30 days. For the health benefits and results I've already seen I believe it is great value for money! I'll definitely be purchasing another pot!

You can purchase your own Beauty Boost Supplements here!

My Autumn Footwear Picks

1. Lace Up Cut Out Peeptoe Heels - New Look - £24.99

2. Miss KG Honest Heels - Kurt Geiger - £80

3. Millie Strapped Heel Sandals - Vivienne Westwood - £227 

4. Leigh Ankle Boots - Supertrash - £215

5. Total Stud Platform Sandals - Forever 21 - £32.75

Autumn is approaching which means storing away our summer sandals until next year and bringing out the booties. For Autumn I like to stick with dark colours, especially with shoes. I've been thinking of what shoes I could bring into my wardrobe this year and found these babies. From high end to high street, I'm loving the strappy and asymmetrical designs this fall. I'm one for detail, and I especially love the orange accent on the Kurt Geiger heels. My particular favourite pair are the Vivienne Westwood sandals, which would look fantastic with a pair of ripped boyfriend jeans and a white jacket. I love studs, especially when I'm feeling edgy, so the Forever 21 platforms would go perfect with a leather jacket. I'd team the New Look peeptoes with a skater skirt, tucked in shirt and a beige Mac. Even a simple zip caught my eye; these Supertrash booties would look great with a pair of skinny trousers for work.

I might need to do a little saving, or look for some dupes, but I've totally fallen in love with these beauties! 

Benefit Cosmetics The Real Steal They're Real Kit

Anyone who knows me has heard me rave about Benefit Cosmetics' They're Real mascara at least once in their company. I've recommended it to most of the ladies I know and take every opportunity I can to buy a beauty box when a sample is on offer. So when Benefit released They're Real Eyeliner and makeup remover I was over the moon! To top that, Benefit Cosmetics released a set a few weeks after the launch called The Real Steal, which featured not only the mascara and eyeliner, but a sachet of the They're Real Eyemakeup remover, AND free delivery, for only £19.50. Considering the mascara on it's own is the same price, it definitely is a steal! 

They're Real Mascara (£19.50)

This mascara, as you know, is one of my favourite beauty products of all time. A lot of people compliment me on my lashes and are left completely in awe when I tell them they aren't false lashes; They're Real! I love the texture, the ease of application, the volume once applied and the longevity of the product. The wand is made from plastic, which feels a lot different to using a normal mascara brush, but it makes application much easier and allows the lashes to separate easily. Only one or two coats are needed for full length, thick lashes. The tiny brushes on the tip of the wand allow you to apply a small amount of mascara to the lower lashes so not to look too fake, and I also use this technique on the outer corners of my eye to lengthen my already-coated lashes for a "cat-eye" look. My only issue is that the mascara is very difficult to remove but as long as you have a decent eye-make-up remover it isn't an issue.  One full size mascara will last me 6-8 months, and a sample size will last me 2-3 months before drying out. Considering the cost of some full size mascaras that only last a few months, They're Real is definitely worth £19.50.

They're Real Mini Push-Up Eyeliner (£18.50)

The They're Real Eyeliner took me a little time to work out how to use, but once a grasped that, I was so impressed! The eyeliner is pushed up by twisting the bottom of the pen, and a small amount of gel liner appears out of the top of the slanted rubber applicator. The pen applies a thick, matte black gel which doesn't lose it's definition throughout the day. It's also waterproof, so it's longlasting and a decent eyemakeup remover is needed! The rubber applicator bends to the lash line for extra precision, but be wary that it doesn't protect 100% from slips and you can still make mistakes! However, the first time I used this I didn't make a single mistake and found it much easier to apply than a felt-tip liner. It's perfect to slip in your handbag to for touch-ups as it's so small and compact, and there is no need for a brush for application.

They're Real Remover (£14.50)

After quite a few complaints and poor reviews stating that the mascara was incredibly difficult to remove, Benefit came up with the They're Real Remover. I received a small sachet of this with the kit and used this when I was wearing both the mascara and the eyeliner. The remover has a creamy consistency and is suitable for my sensitive skin. I massaged it onto my eyes and swiped it off with a cotton pad. I was surprised at how much came off! I repeated this a couple of times to make sure everything was removed. As well as being make-up free, my skin felt very soft and hydrated, as if it was also acting as a moisturiser. This is definitely a great fix for a stubborn, yet irresistible, product

This kit is fantastic value for money overall and is a great opportunity for everyone to try out the new They're Real products before committing to buying the full sized versions. I recommend anyone who is going out to buy the mascara to stop and order this instead. Plus, order from Benefit Cosmetics and receive two free samples of your choice!

Have you tried anything from the They're Real collection? What were your thoughts?

Mini Boots Haul

Today after I woke from a well deserved lie-in, I felt fresh, healthy and pretty, which is incredibly rare for me. I did a spot of cleaning and did my hair and make-up all nice, which is also rare for me! With nothing to do I decided to take a trip to my local boots and pick up a Costa (mango and passion fruit cooler, UNF!). I had no intention of buying anything, but I walked out £25 poorer, whoops!

Olay Essentials Beauty Fluid - £4.99

I recently ran out of this moisturiser and have neglected my skin recently by applying make-up without it. This is by far my favourite moisturiser, I've been using it since I was probably about 7 years old, after my mum told me it would be good for my skin. She has been using it since she was a teen, and her mum also uses it frequently, and both have incredible skin! I thought I'd pick up a bottle and start giving my skin some TCL again. (Full review of Olay Beauty Fluid here!)

Herbal Essences Hello Hydration Deep Nourishing Intensive Mask - £4.79

I saw a tub of this mask in my house the other day and it turns out my mum's been using it. Recently her hair looks flawless and she doesn't do anything to it, but apply this mask when she washes. I do like to copy my mum so I picked up a tub for myself. This mask is suitable for dry/damaged hair, perfect for me! It smells absolutely divine, I can't wait to use it tonight!

V05 Heat Protect Spray - £3.89

I've been using a cheap Wilkios heat spray recently and it has done wonders to my hair. It helps detangle and protect my hair from my GHDs, but I've completely run out! At a recent trip to the hairdressers I was told to use a lot of spray to protect your hair as much as possible, meaning I'm going through bottles like anything. I thought I'd try a high street brand this time to see if it works better. I've heard wonders about this spray and I love V05 Shampoos and Conditioners, so I figured this was bound to help protect my locks. Growing my hair in the past has proven a nightmare, but treating my hair right and keeping it moisturised is greatly reducing split ends and my hair is growing so fast!

Tangle Teezer - £10.99

Eek! I nearly fainted at the price, but no doubt it's worth it! I've seen a thousand positive reviews about Tangle Teezers in that it helps reduce split ends whilst brushing, again something I need to help keep my hair growing. It may be a little more than what I'd normally spend on a hair brush, but if it lives up to it's expectations I won't complain! I have just tried it on my incredibly knotty hair and it flowed through effortlessly, leaving me with untangled hair and the style didn't fall out. Fantastic!

I'm sure I'll review the last 3 products soon. Pray for me that they will help my hair stay sleek and shiny, and grow at a rapid rate!

Ginvera Green Tea Jade Dark Eye Circle Roll Away Review

I've never been one for eye cream; I never really felt the need to use one until recently. I have received a lot of eye products from beauty boxes over the past few months and have tried a few out, but none have given me quite the effect that I expected. That is until I started using this beauty.

The Ginvera Green Tea Jade Dark Eye Circles Roll Away (that's a mouthful!) claims to brighten eyes, firm eye contours and prevent eye bags, crows feet and fine lines. Just what I needed.

I first started using this as I started working out and doing longer car journeys to take my boyfriend to work before taking myself. Driving makes me incredibly tired and with going to the gym and trying to go to bed at the same time as normal I was waking up with puffy, dark circles under my eyes. I looked like I had been crying! The other eye creams weren't working too well for me so I started using this eye roller. What a difference it has made!

I apply this at night before I go to sleep, rolling it under my eyes  and sometimes going up to the lids. I gently pat it into my skin with my fingers and leave to dry. When I wake up in the mornings I find my eyes look more awake, less puffy and brighter in colour. My eyes no longer feel like I have been crying and any soreness I feel under my eyes, being from lack of sleep or using a product that sets off the sensitivity of my skin, is instantly cooled. Occasionally I will use this in the mornings too, especially if I forget to put it on the night before! It gives my tired eyes a healthy glow, whilst working overtime to tackle my eye bags and puffy skin. This glow even makes my face look contoured, without wearing any make-up!

The formula is made out of Jade, which contains healthy minerals, Green Tea, which hydrates and reduces wrinkles and redness, and Ginseng, which include antioxidants to heal damaged and ageing skin. It is a water based formula as opposed to creamy and is unscented, so it absorbs into your skin almost instantly.

This roller has given me the confidence to wake up before work and not apply make-up. Before I'd cake myself in make-up, just so I didn't get comments like "Are you ok? You look shattered". Now I can walk into work bright eyed and looking well slept.

I can definitely say that the skin under my eyes has become more firm over time with this. Although I don't have any wrinkles just yet (god bless), I have a feeling that this would definitely help reduce the look of them, and hopefully delay the ageing process. I have no intention to stop using this product based on this hypothesis.

This roller pen puts the beauty in "beauty sleep". I don't think I'll ever be without it. Ginvera is one of the only brands I trust to do what it says on the tin. The Jade Dark Eye Circle Roll Away pen is no exception.

If you haven't already, read my Ginvera reviews! 

Ginvera Complete Whitening Cleanser 

Ginvera Mini's

Ginvera Bright Eyes Perfect Complexion Gift Set

My new MAC Babies - Creme Cup, Heroine and Morange

Left to Right: Creme Cup - Heroine - Morange

I've lost count of how many MAC lipsticks I have now. My collection is rapidly growing and my bank balance is rapidly decreasing...

After asking the Twittersphere their opinion on which lipstick to buy next, it was clear that Creme Cup and Heronie were the ones to go for (plus if I bought both online I got free postage. Win-win!).

Creme Cup is probably my favourite lipstick out of my entire collection. I've heard other bloggers rave about it but didn't think anything of it; it looked quite plain to me. Once I tried it I was in love! It's such a pretty, subtle shade. I can where a lot of makeup or next to no makeup and it would suit any look. I've worn this lipstick down more than any of the others, and I've only had it a few weeks!

Heroine may be a little too out there for me at the moment, but it might come in useful come Autumn/ Winter, when dark lipstick is more acceptable and my wardrobe is of a darker hue. Heroine is definitely brighter than Up The Amp, which makes it a much more daring colour! I really do love it, but I just don't have the confidence to wear it out at the moment!

Morange is my newest shade, but I'm yet to try it. I've seen this on a few beauty blogs and fell in love with it, so I picked it up in Selfridge's last week. I love the red/orange mix, it makes it stand out from all the other reds on offer. I might wear it for the first time to London tomorrow...

No doubt that while I'm in London I'll pick up another one.

Whoops.